The Sensuality Snare, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Cranium

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader composed in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and men use love to obtain sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where songs analyze great sex as love. But those who fall under the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these singles, having sex brings immense meaning and repercussions.

Singles fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two methods:

A.they think sex is a essential test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready too).

B.more frequently, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as soon as they have sex.
So, instead of looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical tourist attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with reality when all those hormonal agents are cutting loose. Our body reacts to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts sexual desire), that makes the chance to have sex with someone we are attracted to incredibly tough to resist. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), that makes us feel really near to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are involuntary and strong , causing powerful sensations of tourist attraction, enjoyment, well-being, nearness, and love .

When problems occur, those who fall into the Sex Trap typically justify by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, but the sex is great!" They more than likely would not admit it, however they focus on physical intimacy and regard the rest as optional. Their main searching tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay men, states that a number of his clients have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men especially in urban areas, sex is easily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North states. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical appearance, motivates sex. If a possible partner is click over here now going to be sexually compatible, numerous gay men want to find out from the beginning. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to ready?".

North adds, "I think this is a 'guy' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to mention that chemistry is essential. Chemistry is a provided that we can't control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry occur, though often it can grow over time.

Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry risk relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication disappears and truth hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, visit this website you should balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This implies integrating chemistry with sound judgment. While good sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying complete focus on your vision, requirements, values, and objectives -- while feeling all those interesting triggers!

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