The Sexuality Snare, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Head

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader composed in with a dating problem and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to get love, and men use love to obtain sex." This is a excellent summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is comparable to the Love Trap, where singles translate good sex as love. But those who fall under the Sex Trap go even further due to the fact that for these songs, making love carries enormous significance and effects.

Singles fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 methods:

A.they believe sex is a required test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready also).

B.more typically, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual might be a match on levels other than physical destination-- such as long-lasting requirements, needs, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with reality when all those hormonal agents are cutting loose. Our body responds to someone we are brought in to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), which makes the opportunity to make love with someone we are drawn in to incredibly tough to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel very close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical responses are strong and uncontrolled , resulting in powerful sensations of tourist attraction, excitement, love, nearness, and well-being .

When problems occur, those who fall into the Sex Trap often rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is fantastic!" They probably wouldn't admit it, but they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their primary searching tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with gay guys, says that a lot of his clients have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay males specifically in metropolitan locations, sex is readily available, and that in itself is a trap," North states. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be great?".

Nevertheless, North includes, "I believe this is a ' person' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do desire to mention that chemistry is click for more essential. Chemistry is a provided that we can't control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry take place, though in some cases it can grow in time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and reality hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry risk relationship failure.

To you could try these out prevent the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This implies integrating chemistry with good sense. While excellent sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying complete attention to your vision, requirements, goals, and worths -- while feeling all those interesting stimulates!

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